Family and Relationships: When Favoritism Becomes Abuse

In a world of turmoil and uncertainty, there is only one place to go home that is family. There are no perfect family, there comes a time problems and misunderstanding occurs. My family isn’t perfect like everyone else, we grow in different directions yet our roots remain as one.

Well, since we don’t often go outside our house we don’t really know what is happening around, it was only from a relative that we’ve heard that there is a chaos around the neighborhood a few nights ago. It turns out my older cousin and her husband had a misunderstanding with her parents after her husband advice’s their younger brother in-law not to always play basketball and not to go home late at night when his kids are sick and waiting for him at home and then the drama occurs.

My older cousin and her husband who’s only helping and caring were tagged being envious of the younger family and by the parents too. They were told to move away from their house since their house was built in family land, were told that my older cousin almost lost consciousness when the chaos started, what is admirable her husband didn’t left her side, he stayed until the end and he even questioned her parents in-law why my older cousin was treated unjustly, he remind them that my older cousin is their child too just like their favor child and not a stranger.

family

Until now, their family wasn’t in good terms. They stopped talking to each other, my older cousin came to our home the other night, she almost cried while story telling how it happened and how her husband cry when her body started to harden since she didn’t let her emotions out. My mother then told her that my older cousin’s mother should not favor any of them because they were both their child, I interrupted them and butt out telling my mother that it was just like her she also favored my younger sister than me, leaving her tongue tied. Although, I have noticed since our huge fight and after telling her how favoritism is ruled inside our house she already stop favoring my younger sister when we quarreled she just tell us to stop because we are both old but my younger sister the tigress and the ungrateful she was won’t stop attacking me until I cried out of frustration, I was very hurt because after all the things I gave to her she doesn’t even know how to appreciate any single of it and have the courage to treat me unjustly.

Favoritism

What is saddening my mother told me to treat her nicely since she is the only one I will be having in the future but seeing how I am treated today, being kick without even a chance to defend myself I have realized I have no one to rely on when I grow old, I will be alone by myself. Such a pity, isn’t it?

Anyway, I told my older cousin that in a few weeks they will start talking again since they are family but she doubts it since her younger sister is planning to sue them for unknown reason, well that’s the problem when pride is higher than the person.

I have read online that family favoritism can create long-term emotional problems and can devastate family relationships and the consequences of parental favoritism are mostly bad. Disfavored children experience worse outcomes across the board: more depression, greater aggressiveness, lower self-esteem, and poorer academic performance.  Many of these consequences persist long after children have grown up and moved out of the house. People don’t soon forget that they were disfavored by their parents, and many people report that being disfavored as a child continues to affect their self-esteem and their relationships in adulthood.

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