The weather isn’t nice today it is very gloomy maybe because of the typhoon. I am not still feeling well too but it didn’t stop me from waking up early and taking a bath. I need to hold on so I can live; this Sunday is Women’s Sunday so the scriptural topic is about women, and how God uses women for the victory of Israel.

We remember women’s faith, strong amid challenges.

The speaker for today is our Pastor’s wife, she said it was her first time to speak in front of congregation but I think she did well. I was touched and blessed many times on her messages; I am able to digest a lot of after thoughts.

God knocked to us when we are wandering away to wake us up, we are not given problems we cannot overcome and problems are God’s way for us to seek Him. Our prayers will be answered on His time just few of the messages I can recall. I have a lot of troubles, I am weary and what is making me to stand is my hope and my faith that everything will be fine in God’s perfect time.

Going to church after three consecutive Sundays, I am slowly becoming comfortable with people’s presence. I am now able to look around and smile to the older women I’ve seen in the church unlike the first time I can’t do it. Being embarrassed to go to church after a long time was also the reason why I didn’t go to church for a long period, and I have overcome that embarrassment when one morning I decided to go, that was the time I cannot carry all my burdens anymore and my heart is overflowing with sadness. I am now learning to feel comfortable with people, I hope slowly I will be able to gain confidence.

Nobody know what am I going through except my family. A cousin asked me why I am not leaving the country yet, my replied “It is more fun in our town” my family knew it because I can’t hide it from them when I started crying out loud like someone died, well my heart dies.

Well, after church and lunch at home I went back to bed and I have been sleeping all day.